God's Family #3

Throughout the New Testament, the inspired writers refer to the members of the church as "brethren." I have read the word many times and brushed over it unthinking, busy with other lessons in the text, but as I reflect on God's teaching about family, I find that this is an important word. The word refers to a brother, a person born of the same parents. God's use of this relationship to describe the relationship between fellow Christians is interesting. The world would have us believe that it is perfectly normal for siblings to fight, to hate each other, to be jealous of each other, to push each other away as hard as possible. I do not think this type of relationship is what God had in mind. Remember the story of Cain and Abel? Certainly this is extreme example, but Cain was punished for just such an attitude as is displayed today by many. Instead, this sibling bond should be something very special, so special in fact that the Greek language spoken by the early church had a word which applied solely to it - philadelphia, or "brotherly love." (I Pet. 1:22) This brotherly love is a type of affection which connects siblings with each other in a way that is different from their connection with any other person. This affection leads to behavior toward each other that is different than that toward any other person. According to I Pet. 3:8, we should be so bound to a sibling that we feel what they feel and behave toward them accordingly. James 5:9 commands us not to whine against our brethren. John 3:14-18 eplains how we will act toward our brother if we do have that connection with them that God intended. We will be willing to give anything and everything for the good of our brethren, even to the point of sacrificing our lives to protect them if need be. The strong affection of brotherly love leads to the actions described by agape love. There is certainly no room for jealousy or hatred in God's description of sibling relationships. If this is the  attitude and behavior we should have toward our physical siblings, how does this extend to our spiritual family? We know from the above passages and others that God considers all Christians to be spiritual siblings. That means that we should have the same attitude and behavior toward every Christian as we would have toward a physical brother or sister. Unfortunately, all too often in the church today, the members have little or no relationship with each other, relying on traditional and outward tokens of consideration which have no basis in actual care for each other. I think that the underlying problem, both in our physical families and in our spiritual families, is that we do not know each other. Family members spend very little time together and when together have no idea how to connect with each other. Interaction is limited to brief and awkward exchanges with no real information being imparted. We have lost the ability to communicate with each other and so to connect with each other.  Stay tuned for the next blog post to learn what God has to say about communication.

God's Family #2

What was God's intention when he created the roles of parents and children? Eph. 6:1 commands children to obey their parents, but does that give the parents the role of dictator in the family? On the contrary. The very next verse commands fathers not to provoke their children to wrath, but to feed or nourish them with Godly instruction and discipline. So many people seem to think that they have no say at all in what their children become, that their role is to just let the children express themselves and find their own way. Obedience has no place in their home. So many others think that teaching their children means laying down the law about everything without explanation, and that obedient children are those who never question the parents' dictates. These two approaches also exist in the church family. I have been in congregations where the elders did not follow the instructions given them in I Timothy and Titus to teach and watch over the brethren and so allowed false doctrine and worldliness into the spiritual family. I have also been in congregations where the elders were more concerned with maintaining their authority and furthering their own agendas than in feeding the flock, and as a result watched their spiritual family either flee in disgust and rebellion or retreat into unproductive lethargy. I do not believe that either approach is what God had in mind. Certainly there are occasions for simple exertion of authority, such as when a child continues in rebellion against the parent or a member against the elders in spite of understanding instruction. There is also occasion for allowing a person to learn from their own experiences, good or bad.  However, two passages come to mind in describing what God had in mind when He created the role of parent. Deut. 4:9 instructs the Israelites to teach their children the commandments of God. The word for teach comes from a word which means "to know, to find out and discern, to know by experience, to consider, to be wise." (Brown, Driver, Briggs) This is much more than drilling through a succession of facts and requires much more from the student than blind acceptance. God wanted us to teach our children to think, to question, to search, to be able to distinguish between truth and falsehood regardless of the source. People, whether children or adults, who are consistently told authoritatively to accept without question quickly learn to leave the thinking to others and exist in a mental vegetative state. Thus, in spite of factual knowledge otherwise, when confronted with a similarly authoritative statement contradicting what they have already been taught, they find they cannot defend their "knowledge" and end up accepting the new statement without question, regardless of its truth. I Tim. 3:4 commands that an elder rule his house well. The word "rule" in this verse, in addition to the literal meaning, also means "to be a protector or guardian, to give aid, to care for, give attention to." A parent who follows this instruction correctly is going to be more concerned with the growth and the needs of the child, and his or her behavior toward the child will reflect that concern. Commandments will be given, but so will instruction, guidance, patience, and experience. Elders who apply this same thinking to their role in the church will provide the same for the members in their charge. Obedience to such rule is much more willingly given because it is earned by the demonstration of love for God and for others, rather than demanded.

God's Family

I have been thinking a lot about family lately, both physical and spiritual, and observing what passes for both in most cases today. I thought I would share what has been going through my mind, as there are several things about this subject that are weighing on my mind. It seems that the world in general, including much of the church, has forgotten the definitions of some very important terms. I don't mean the dictionary definition, although in many cases that also has been changed; I mean the way God defined the roles and institutions described by these words. The word "family" itself has become so twisted and abused that I think we desperately need to return to the scripture to determine what God had in mind for that institution.
All of us in the church know that in the beginning God created one man and one woman, and that this first couple had children, and that they as a group were the first family. We teach this basic concept even in our nursery classes. However, if these basic facts were all that was necessary to create family, why is it that so many families falling into disfunction and disrepair, even in the church? If the word family merely describes a unit group of parents and children, or even expands to include grandparents and extended relatives, why is it that God described the church as a family? What is the connection? Thinking of the church as a family, why do Christian brothers and sisters care so little for the state of the church family? Why are so many of our children "dying out" of the church? I think if we spent some time breaking down God's plan for family and searching out his definitions of some key words related to family, we might find a terrifying answer.
For the next few weeks, as I have opportunity, I plan to do a series of posts in search of the Biblical concept of family and all that goes with it. I will look at words like "parent," "child," "brother/sister," "husband/wife," "love," "communicate," "edify," etc. Stay tuned, and please contribute thoughts from you own study for my benefit.

A Life of Service

Ok, so it has been months since I have posted. However, in the last few months, many things have happened. One of those things has been the purchase of our first home (woohoo!) at which we have internet access on demand! For me, this has been a blessing, as it allows me to keep in touch with friends and family much more often and, more importantly, allows me more tools for Bible study. The best and most demanding result of internet access has been an increase in the amount of study I have been able to do with a young man from India with whom I have been conducting correspondence courses for several years. Although he has not yet obeyed the gospel, he has put me to shame many times as we studied. We have spent a great deal of time over the last few months studying through the gospel accounts, learning about the purpose of Jesus' coming and teaching and dying. In that time, he has changed from a young man who was always begging for help in getting a secular education so that he could escape his life in the village to a young man who spends all his free time teaching children's Bible classes, working extra hours to earn money to buy supplies for needy families, and travelling to surrounding villages spreading the Word of God and doing what benevolence he can. He does not yet understand the importance of baptism and the church, but he understands what it means to be Christlike, much better than I think many of us do. I often feel ashamed when I look at how blessed I am materially compared with much of the world's population and realize how little I have actually done for God. I pray that I may do a better job of seeking out and taking advantage of opportunities to live a life of service so that I don't have to face my God with regret and shame in the Day of Judgment.

Marketing Woes

Okay, so I decided that I had overpriced my book, and went on to figure out how much I could reduce the price. Got some help from my dad, who owns a bookstore with my mom, to determine what a fair price would be. Had settled on one when he suddenly reminded me that I had to maintain the appropriate discount for bookstores, and pointed out that depending on my sales I might have to pay taxes. Frustration! Apparently, I have not overpriced my book! So, sorry, folks. Gotta pay Caesar! If you can't afford it, wait for the ebook version. (Or if you live near me, come talk to me!)

Rewriting old writing - here's a sample

Well, I did call this blog wordworker's books, so I should probably once in a while post something about a book, or at least story. Here is a piece of one I wrote several years ago and recently decided to resurrect.

          "The impact startled him, crashing onto his ears like a thousand breaking dishes. Dazed, he stared stupidly at the crumbled bricks on the smoking hood. Confused voices reached his auditory nerves as from a distance, incomprehensible. Dimly he associated the voices with the unfocused figures spinning frenetically across his field of vision. One of them with a red trembling nose flailed his arms at the wreckage. The man laughed.

            The way she had laughed at him when he came off the diving board fully clothed.   Showing off for the girls, as usual. With disastrous results, not as usual. That was the first time he ever saw her. It was his parents’ turn to host the monthly church social, and everyone was gathered in the backyard. The adults huddled around the grill debating methods of barbecuing ribs and recipes for potato salad. A couple of teenagers horsing around on the far end of the lot. His friend Beau, with sly looks in the direction of a gaggle of girls, had decided to demonstrate how to balance a pyramid of coke cans on one hand. Provoked into action by the evident success of Beau’s stunt, he declared he could balance the same tray of cokes on his head while jumping up and down on the diving board.

He took one look from the end of that diving board and it was all over. He had hauled himself out of the pool dripping and shivering in the October air while everyone scrambled to retrieve the rapidly sinking cans. All he remembered after that was the piquant mocking face over the side fence. He ran self-conscious fingers through his hair and tried to affect nonchalance. He sauntered in the general direction of the girl, his soggy sneakers making sucking sounds around his ankles.

            “Haven’t seen you here before,” he said.

            “I just moved here with my dad,” she told him, suddenly very interested in her cuticles. She added unnecessarily, “There’s water on your nose.”

            “Oh. Yeah.” He rubbed his arm unhelpfully across his face. “Uh, wanna come over?”

            “No, thanks,” she answered, abandoning her nails to look him over appraisingly. She flipped her red hair with an air of superiority. “My dad doesn’t let me hang out with strangers.”

            He felt his stomach flip. “Levi,” he gulped. “I mean – I’m Levi.”

            “From the Bible,” she said. “Me too. I’m Chloe. Ironic!”

            A man came to the door of the house on her side of the fence and stood watching them. Chloe looked toward him and turned as if to go.

            “My brother has a band,” Levi blurted, forgetting to ask what was ironic. “Sometimes I play drums for them.” He beat a haphazard rhythm on the nearest fence post, ending with a theatrical pirouette. He waited impressively for the admiring applause he felt sure his performance deserved, and felt his cheeks grow warm at the sound of her laughter.

            “I have to go,” she said. She flipped her hair again and turned away, leaving him stewing on his own side of the fence. At the back door she turned mocking eyes back on him for a moment, and he hung breathless. “See you in school, Levi,” she said. The man stayed in the doorway, watching.

            He moved away from the fence, feeling dizzy. Not noticing the Coke can under his feet. The bridge of his nose snapped on the pavement, and the can splatted against the wall with a hiss.

            The world turned black while colors he’d never seen before exploded behind his eyes. A spray of red banished the blackness as his head snapped back in the grip of an invisible rubber band. He felt rather than heard the windshield implode, spraying glass and washer fluid all over the front seat. For a suspended moment he gazed fascinated at the rainbow pinpricks of light flying toward him as if fleeing from the crumbling wall relentlessly bulldozing a path through his engine."

Perspective

Recently I have been feeling greatly overwhelmed by life. I have a one-year-old daughter who thinks she is twenty-one, thinks she should be able to do anything she wants by herself, and who can somehow manage to reach even unreachable items! I am three months pregnant with our second child, and consequently low on energy and high on hormones! I live several hours away from most of my family and still manage to get caught up in typical family disfunction without being able to enjoy many of the benefits. Health issues keep my husbands family in turmoil and us busy trying to help fill in the blanks left by those health issues. I am extremely active in the church, as is my husband, and that means about half of our free time each week is filled up with church related activities or preparation. Because of my husband's job and the degenerating morality of this country, we decided several years ago to take martial arts lessons to learn self-defense, so that fills up a couple of nights a week. Somewhere between all that, we still find time to be a family by ourselves. Writing? That almost never happens! All important, some enjoyable, but together quite a load! Occasionally, like this week, it becomes too much to handle. Then, I wake up and turn on the news. Flooding in New Jersey due to massive storms is driving thousands out of their homes. Tornadoes in various places along the east coast resulting in the same. And the biggest news item of all, thousands dead and unimaginable destruction in the Pacific due to the fifth largest earthquake ever recorded and the tsunami that followed it. Hey, what's wrong with my life again? I am alive. I have my husband and my children safe with me and need have no fear for anyone else that I care about. We have a house and a car, and money with which to provide our family's needs. I don't have to worry about how to survive an hour from now, tomorrow, next week... There is nothing wrong with my life. In fact, I have the greatest life ever!